hurried scribble from random midnight musings

most of life ultimately is/will be an explore vs exploit tradeoff. how much to explore, when to exploit & where to stop are things which we (are supposed to) figure out as we experience life

personally, I still have not gotten a hang of it. i wish i could bayesian optimise my way to arrive at the optimal life co-ordinates

but a few things I’ve learnt along the way are - its okay to explore a lot. exploring until one finds that resonance (read magic) is what life is all about. it can be frustrating - not sticking long enough (read exploiting enough), comes at the cost of compounding. iterating a lot can feel like moving a lot of distance without any meaningful displacement. it can be tiresome + inflict serious self-doubt; especially when we see compounding kick in for other people

going on inward spirals while trying to strike the right balance between exploring & exploiting + getting trapped in existential loops can be point-in-time unpleasant

but trusting the process is the key. knowing that iterating long enough can hone our gut in ways that can help us figure out what aligns best with our internal mechanics is a belief worth internalising

it is easier said than done, but being on the perpetual quest is better than perpetually living with things one does not feel a deep harmony with

there is a possibility that one might never find the optimal co-ordinates. but (i guess) a life well lived will be less remorseful than a life not well optimised

there is no one way of doing life. it is okay to want to change the world one day & be a barista another day. a barista is also changing the world for better - one smile at a time

it is okay to write our own life narratives, & it is perfectly okay for these narratives to be ever changing (oh forget ever evolving)

because it is our game & what a waste it would be if played with externally imposed rules